The Leaf Blog: The Optimist & Pessimist Debate
The following are selected snippets from an imaginary staged debate between a glass-half-full Leafs Optimist, and a sour-hearted “this ship is sinking/sunken” Leafs Pessimist…
Optimist says: Ron Wilson will get the troops out of this, he’s an old pro, and he’s faced more adversity than this. He’s won 552 games in the NHL. Do you really believe this slow start fazes him?
Pessimist says: He’s already looking desperate, and we’re still in October. The man is running out of tricks. The bag skate, the veteran healthy scratches, a jovial game of dodgeball, 3-on-3 — What’s next, road hockey? You can’t gimmick your way out of this crisis. With a roster like this, I don’t think anyone can right the ship.
Optimist says: It’s funny you mention the quality of the roster, because that was my next point. These guys are underperforming, and everybody knows it. Most of this team can do a lot better with the tools they possess, and they will. It’s only a matter of time. You can’t hold down an entire roster’s worth of talent all year. This team will win some lobsided games, believe me. Hagman, Poni, Blake, maybe Stempniak, and definitely Kessel are good for 20-goal seasons.
Pessimist says: Blake? 20 goals? Maybe he can convince Burke to trade a pick for Dominic Moore! Remember Dominic Moore? He was the best forward on the roster last year, and nobody worked harder. Why did Burke let him walk when he single-handedly got one of your most onerous contracts to seem not-so-onerous? But forget trading a pick, because Double-B has gone all JFJ on us and said, “to hell with draft picks!” And don’t get me started on Phil Kessel.
Optimist says: It’s funny that folks like yourself believe that because of the Kessel trade, picks have become meaningless to the organization. Despite giving away two firsts, the emphasis on developing internally in this organization is the new way of thinking. Viktor Stalberg, Nikolai Kulemin, John Mitchell, Carl Gunnarsson, Nazem Kadri, Jiri Tlusty. Need me to go on? These are homegrown players.
Pessimist says: Those players are all terrible.
Optimist says: Jiri Tlusty is tearing up the AHL with 9 points in 7 games, and Viktor Stalberg is a player who Bob Mckenzie said could contend for the Calder Trophy this year. Nazem Kadri is terrible? Remember that shootout move?
Pessimist says: Wait, Tlusty is tearing, as in ripping? Or tearing as in crying, because whenever he gets called up he goes on unbelievable cold streaks and sulks his way back to the Marlies. Oh, I forgot about Viktor “Always Drives Down the Left Wing Predictably” Stalberg. And isn’t Nazem Kadri 7th on the London Knights in scoring right now? Oh, but Ron Wilson said he’d get 100 points this year. Oh, that makes sense.
Optimist says: You also forget that Burke will find a way to get some picks back before the year is done.
Pessimist says: Yeah, Burke could get some picks back, but the only way to get picks is to give up roster players. Any roster players worth a pick would hurt the team if they were traded. Which would make our (Boston’s) first-rounder next year more valuable. See the dilemma??
Optimist says: I disagree. The hope is for a youngster or two to step up and grab a roster spot before the year is done. Bozak, Tlusty, Hanson (who had 3 points the other night) could fit that description. Then, you trade a Grabbo, a Hagman, or even a Stempniak for a 2nd or 3rd rounder. If the Leafs can grab two 2nds for 2010, the draft will be a relative success.
Pessimist says: 0-6-1.
Optimist says: Look at the teams we’ve played, all near the top of the league record-wise.
Pessimist says: Well, it’s unfortunate we can’t contend against winning teams, because in the NHL, 16 out of 30 teams make the playoffs. More than half. So enjoy splitting the season series with the 14-non playoffs clubs, and perhaps having an edge of maybe 5 of them.
Optimist says: Well you just wait until we get Phil Kessel back. 12th in the league in goals last year playing only 70 games. Former 5th overall pick, the kid is nasty.
Pessimist says: Oh really? wait until a socially-awkward 22-year-old with an illness and injury history is put under a microscope in hockey-mad Toronto? Wait until the media picks on him, he’ll be wishing he could go back to Boston/Wisconsin/Anywhere-but-here, as fast as he signed his 5.4 million dollar contract with Burkie. Plus, he looks like a bear cub. Everyone knows that players who look like their team’s animal are more prone to success. Example, Evgeni Malkin looks like an emperor penguin, Ovechkin looks like a bald eagle, and Shane Doan looks like a coyote.
Optimist says: That was a really poor point to finish this debate on.
Pessimist says: Sorry…
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This was a hilarious read, but some of the funniest points are true. I tend to agree with the pessimist on a lot of points, but I believe there is hope for the leafs this year. I think they win on Saturday and go on a decent run through November with a healthy goaltending tandem and the savior Phil Kessel in the lineup.
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